8/14/14

Meet Socrates



Name: Socrates

Age: "3—but that's 21 in dog years."

Occupation: Haley's canine companion. "I trained to be a seeing-eye dog, but didn't graduate. And that's fine by me. Those dogs work hard—I mean, it's practically 24/7. Sure, I go with Haley to Leaves of Grass every day and greet people and keep an eye out for shoplifters, but it's not like I'm shelving books and taking out the trash."

Residence: Haley's apartment on 10th and 51st.

Originally from: New Rochelle Kennels

Relationships: Mother (Velvet) still lives in New Rochelle. "I never met my dad, but Mom said I look just like him." Brother (Casey) is a security dog in Times Square. "I see him every once in a while. He thinks he's a big shot, but he's on his paws all day. What kind of life is that?" Dr. Woof, his veterinarian. Chantale, a standard poodle who goes to the dog run. "She's beautiful. So regal. But she doesn't even know I'm alive."

Favorite Possessions: "My dog bed in Leaves of Grass. It's actually more comfortable than the one I have at home. That's why I sleep with Haley at night. She has a memory foam mattress." Tennis ball that's been chewed in half. Squeaky toy that drives Haley crazy.

Likes: Treats. Naps. Meat—especially grilled lamb from the Halal truck. Visits to Dr. Woof ("Hey, it means getting treats!"). Chasing Canada geese in the Hudson River Park. Peanut butter. Sunbathing in the Hell's Kitchen Community Garden.

Dislikes: Small dogs who try to pick fights. When Haley makes soap. "I'm banished to the bedroom because of the lye. I know it's for my own good, but I feel left out." Not being allowed to eat sugar and chocolate or drink beer.

Favorite Soap that Haley Makes: Gee, You Fur Smells Terrific Dog Shampoo Bars.

A Few Words from Socrates: "My life's been great since Haley adopted me. She listens to me. And if it weren't for me she wouldn't have found Joyce's body in the Hell's Kitchen Community Garden."



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